2004-09-08 - 9:16 p.m.
I wrote too much in the last entry, but I put my heart into it. I've written several times today. Ofcourse it's all out of a childish hope that 'she's' reading them all. She's got more will power than I do anyway.
I was taking a shower and I got very excited. I realized that at the very very latest, I was going to be out of debt by February. That is at the very latest too, it's a very safe number. Depending on how much aid I get from the government this year, I could be out of debt by December, or even November. I wish I could explain the bittersweet feeling it brings me to see the end of my debt so close in sight, but you'll have to trust me when I say that I'm very pleased, but still bittersweet.
At the same time, I'm struck at how quickly I want to abandon all alterior motives and be a friend to someone when they are clearly hurting. It really sucks to see it go down like that, but my heart prays as unselfishly tonight as it ever has. I'm going to go to the Daily Grind and study...I figuer it might make me feel like a college student.
What's more frightening to a sailor, a typhoon, or no wind at all? Being still is harder than being rocked...amen?
